Monday, February 21, 2005

Drag Kings

The SO asked me yesterday if I wanted to go to a drag king show. Initially, I did not want to. It was a Sunday. We were going to our financial group which sometimes stresses me out. But, the SO does not ask for things often. And oftentimes, her trips are interesting, fun and exciting. So although, the Great Maker was weeping on a cold Sunday evening, off to Jack London Square we went to see the show King Heat at the Oakland Metro.

Sunday, February 20, 2005
King Heat
featuring performances by:
Nappy Grooves
Simone de la Ghetto (of Harlem Shake)
Sile Singleton AKA Luster
Carlos Las Vegas
Roscoe D. Gitchoding
Show - 8:00pm Doors -7:30pm Tickets: $7-10 18+

The location is not on my top ten lists of places to visit in Oakland. The bar is located next to the restaurant strip on Broadway populated by Everett & Jones BBQ, a Chinese seafood restaurant and Nations Burgers. The building was dark; the tables were small; the stage was adequate. But, you must understand. This is not Broadway. This is burlesque if I were alive to see burlesque. This is Off-Off-Off-Off Broadway in New York terms. Minimal lighting, though more than a high school's. Movie house seating, which means that on one side are arrayed a series of metal chairs. An odd prelude to an odd evening.

Lesbians are interesting to me. On the one hand, we have something in common. They love women. I love women! Hooray! And, they are women who love women. I love women who love women! Hooray! On the other hand, some of them are masculine woman who love women. That is where I draw the line. If you start looking too much like a man, or smelling like a man, a buzzer goes off in my head.

Red alert! Red alert! This is a man. This is not cute. This is not sexual. This is not a woman!!!

So, call me Moby Dick out of the ocean last night. I did not know how to react. Should I be aroused? Let me tell you. It's pretty hard to be hard when you are looking at a bunch of females who look like men. Should I be bonding with the men? But in some ways, there were more masculine than I am. I just don't know. Call me Moby.

One interesting thing of note is how the women transform themselves into men. They wear facial hair. I found it interesting because in one way, it completes the illusion of how society sees men. Masculinity is more hair. The closer one looks to animals with fur, the more masculine a person becomes. Now, for those of you balding like me do not lose hope. You should remember that the hair follicles fall out because of an excess of a form of testosterone called DHT. Biologically speaking, if you are balding, you are an uber man. You are testosterone man unbound.

It was a drag king show. Essentially, a woman dresses up as a man and lip-synchs. Now, I am more used to draq queens who actually sing their songs. But I figure, drag kings must be relatively new compared to drag queens. Just wait a few more years. In Pin@y terms, these are women who like to sing karaoke.

Now, being Moby, let us discuss what disturbed / confused me the most. When Papa Dino who is part of Kreatibo was on stage, he had a dancer. Now, I guess they were all getting hot because a nice young woman with a cowboy hat from the audience joined them on stage. Now here's the disturbing part. The nice young cowgirl did some hot and nasty things on stage. Though I should mention that this was with clothes on. Call me Moby ouf of the water. Errr, this is becoming like a sex voyeur thing. Err, shouldn't I be paying more for this? Hell, in San Francisco, it would be $50 at the door. Unlimited in and out. Heck, add the chatelaine in the mix and she would the whole San Francisco art world in a tizzy about a performance act show!!!

Now, the second thing that was disturbing about this was that the guy on stage was dressed like a cholo. Now, being from LA, the last thing I can think of is a cholo being a sexual being. Usually, cholos are packing some guns and getting ready to waste or beat someone up. The last thing I need in my head is a cholo with his belt whipping a nice young thin cowgirl and that nice young cowgirl riding the cholos thigh. Disturbing.

As if that was not enough, at the end of the show, one of the performers starts getting his groove on a woman. Initially, the woman was standing with some heavy breathing with the man. The man started rubbing and dancing Then she sat down. The man continued to rub and shake. Then, her back was being supported by the chair. One of the SO's friends had to push the chairback so that the woman would not fall. Did I mention that the man was about 250 lbs? yup, a rubbing dancing two hundred pound weight. On a not so skinny but apparently quite flexible and durable woman.

I figured, five minutes. Folks, twenty minutes later, it had become a threesome with the fresh young cowgirl. I did not know if I was supposed to be aroused or what. So I did the next best thing. I left for the evening.

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