Wednesday, November 19, 2003

The Colonized Marrying the Colonizer

I was having dinner with a friend when she asked me, "What should I tell my students when they see that I am dating a white guy?"

My initial reaction to this question was "It's none of their business." But then again, if a student asks a professor this question, they have brass balls and they deserve a proper answer.

The SO thinks that there are actually two types of Filipinas who marry white guys. The first type is the woman who wants the green card (mail order brides). America is the saving grace/bread/last hope so if the only way to get to America is to marry someone with a green card, then so be it.

Now, I personally don't look down on this type of woman (mail-order brides). I lived in the Philippines and can remember looking at the songhits magazine and wishing that men could put ads so that some beautiful white woman would pick me and fly me off to America. Poverty is so rampant, and life is so difficult in the Philippines that America is more preferable. I still believe this thought to this day. (Now you know where I stand when it comes to immigration.)

The second type of woman is the Pinay who is so powerful, so smart, so intelligent that she intimidates the living hell/bejesus/daylights out of Pinoy men whether they be from the Philippines or the US of A. You know they type. They don't take any non-sense or bullshit from the guys. They look at the man and instantly know that they can't cook, clean the bathroom, or take care of the kids, or get a job. So, why should they consider them as a life partner?

In general, I believe that Pinoys (from the Phil or from US of A) want women who will serve them, never tell them that they are wrong and will tolerate their stupid ways (alcoholism, gambling, philandering). On the other hand, I am of the lazy type of man. I personally want a woman who is smarter, faster, better than I am because the world is a mean and nasty place to live in. The better my woman warrior/protector is, the better off I am. I am lucky to have a Pinay who actually accepts me for who I am.

There are certainly some issues with marrying the colonizer. Thankfully, I don't have to face such challenges. I believe though that the goal of life is to be happy. If you are faced with marrying someone who will abuse you and marrying someone who will die to give you the world, it's a no-brainer choice to me.

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